Trust is absolutely pivotal in any relationship, and the foundation on which we then build from, allowing us to feel relaxed, contented and happy with those key people. It is not just two people living together or being married to each other that require trust; we need this from people we work with, our friends, our parents and our children. Those people closest to us are the ones that cause us the most pain if that trust is then broken, resulting in the relationship becoming damaged and sometimes beyond repair. Trust, however, absolutely can be built back up and relationships repaired through communicating effectively with each other on all levels.
Most people have- at some point in their lives- been let down by someone they love or care about, and at the time it feels as though you will never be the same again, but over time these feelings ease and fade, enabling you to once again trust that person. But they have to show you that this is possible of course, and it will take time and effort from both of you to rebuild and regain that all-important trust.
The most important thing in all of this is talking it through with each other. You cannot and must not let feelings of hurt and resentment build up inside you, as not only is this damaging to your own health, it will eventually damage your relationship with that person and thus become irreparable. Has the breakdown of trust triggered old wounds that haven’t healed properly?
It may be that what has happened isn’t the same thing, but it has conjured up feelings that you have previously tried to push away and hide. Secondly, it is vital that the person who has betrayed you acknowledges that they have done so, and must be able to show remorse and compassion for you and for the situation. If they are being blasé about it, chances are that this person is not who you thought they were, resulting in you making decisions about whether you still want that person in your life.
It is always very difficult to trust someone again after any kind of betrayal, and also to allow yourself to feel relaxed in that person’s company. You may be constantly wondering if they are going to do it again, and not knowing whether you would be better to let that person go from your life. You can ask yourself certain questions, such as ‘do I want or need this person in my life?’, ‘are my instincts telling me they will repeat that betrayal?’ and ‘how would I react if this happened again?’. Trust your instincts at all times as they are rarely wrong, and ensure you do what is right for you, and not what someone else wants you to do.
Communicate, communicate, communicate. Whether that is between the two of you (or group of you if it is friendships or colleagues) or whether you have a mediator. It is fundamental to talk it through, come to your own conclusions and decisions and then restart your path, whichever way that may be.
But if you do rebuild that trust, let the past be the past and allow yourself to start afresh, because hanging on to something that happened previously will only cause you to feel resentment and hurt and stop you from growing as a person.
If you would like any further info about how hypnotherapy and a Positive Thinking Styles course can help with the problems created by a lack of trust, then please contact me on 01202 245020 or 07920885015.
Confidentiality is strictly observed at all times.